This is an excellent question. I was also the only adopted child in my immediate family although I had two cousins who were also adopted (1 transracially, but both were domestic adoptions and whose family lived far away in a large multicultural city). I have an older brother and sister (10 and 6 years my senior respectively). I often felt they were my like my second set of parents rather than siblings, which wasn’t always an easy emotional road for any of us. Luckily, however, I still grew up feeling close to my siblings, rather than distanced.

That said, I think it would have been absolutely wonderful to have had another brother or sister closer to my age who was adopted. I don’t think it would have mattered if he / she was from the same culture or not. The mere fact of having someone else who was also different, not just in my own family, but also my own community would have been a tremendous comfort. It would helped me feel less alone, less of a freak. Not to mention that it would have helped to divert some of that dreaded attention I had (as all transracially adopted children have) onto someone else for better or worse.

So, yes, if you can manage, emotionally and financially, to adopt again,  I would definitely suggest it but I don’t think adopting from the same cultural and / or ethnic background is essential.

Our second question comes to us from Kim:

I just came across your site and I think the Parents Corner idea is brilliant. I want to thank you for creating this and putting yourself out there for the benefit of our adopted children.

I noticed that two of you stated that you were the only adopted child in your family and that you had older siblings. I have two biological children (13 and 11) and a son adopted from Kazakhstan (2). My question for you is if it would have made your life growing up a bit easier if you’d had another adopted sibling in the home. If so, I would assume that it would have been best for that child to share your racial/cultural background. Please correct me if I am wrong in my assumption. I hate to presume anything.

We are considering adopting again and one of the major reasons for that is that I feel it may be best for my son to have a sibling closer to his age, that is also adopted, and from the same country/culture as he. So, in your opinions, would it have made it easier/better for you growing up with another adopted sibling with similar circumstances as your own?