Question #7: Juli

This is a tricky issue. Of course, if you maintain a relationship with your child’s birth parent(s), you need to be transparent about it. This creates pressure, on both sides. The birth parent(s) may expect to have a relationship with the child. Conversely, the child may feel pressured to have a relationship with them. Not [...]

Question #7: JoLynn

I see your point and that could be an option, but he may or may not want to ever meet his birth parents.  In any case you would have already done the “leg work” so to speak.  As long as the birth parents knew that it was up to your son to ultimately decide if [...]

Question #7

Another question dealing with birth parent searches:
I have a follow-up question on the birth parent search issue.  I, too,
have been thinking about ways to open our adoption a bit more on
behalf of my 3-year-old son.  I noticed that each respondent said that
the decision of whether or not to have birth family contact should be
up to [...]

Question #6: JoLynn

For my own experience…my search didn’t begin with my parents initiating that conversation. However, I always knew that was an option open to me & they’d be supportive. They never pushed and I am glad they didn’t. I think I would have felt strange and uncomfortable if they kept bring up that possibility. [...]

Question #6: Heather

I think it’s great that you’re encouraging your kids to search. That’s not an easy thing to do and I hope that some day the birth mother you found will be open to a relationship some day. As for the other child, I wouldn’t push. If your close relationship continues into adulthood then he / [...]